themangodojo:

nessamiibo:

kayakookie:

If my future s/o doesn’t stare at me like I’m their whole world while I stand like a crackhead in the candle section of target smelling every single candle before buying one then whats the point

back-that-sass-up:

raepritewrites:

back-that-sass-up:

not to be racist but i can’t tell customers apart

The truth hurts so much, but it cannot be denied - 2 minutes after you leave my line of sight, I have no idea who you are, you’re just another arm I’ve stabbed with a needle

god I hope you work in the medical field

reblog if your name isn’t Amanda.

pastassassins:

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

mojavemadness:

Become the weird space wizard you want to see airbrushed on the side of a van

feenyxblue:

excellent-monster-girl-ideas:

bpdmemes:

Alexa release the serotonin

“Releasing neurotoxin.”

“ALEXA, NO-”

Portal(2007)

thatnordicguy:

theawesomeadventurer:

theawesomeadventurer:

deliverusfromsburb:

Shoutout to Ed for identifying as agnostic after God ripped two of his limbs off

a total power move

when your legs don’t work like they used to before

lieutenant-sapphic:

shakespeare is not pretentious. fans of shakespeare are pretentious. shakespeare is twelve hundred dirty jokes strung together by increasingly ridiculous plotlines and increasingly homosexual characters. don’t let the archaic language fool you

the-fairy-dong-mother:

1st oc: hi im just a normal highschooler im kinda depressed but i swear im not a mary sue

30th oc:

hopeful-weirdo:

junkiechurch:

master has snatched dobbys wig

I’m ashamed how hard I laughed at this

theglassesgirl: